Queen

I've spent night after night looking for you.

Wanting you to be there. Wanting some kind of peace.

Then I found it. Put it in the center of me.

But to achieve eternal peace?

I had to throw out all the things that cluttered me. Encased me.

A hoarder of emotions, a path unkempt and littered.

My heart was a prison. My mind a jail.

Here beside peace I could no longer live in a cell and I began to dismantle the mainframe. And I no longer searched for you. I no longer Needed you. I could do it myself.

A Queen finally.

The lone protector of me projected through a mirror image.

Fierce and sometimes careless. But real. So real and raw and True.

And honest.

More honest than I ever could be with you.

Ah but now? I see the change you could never accept.

I see the grains of sand ticking and it no longer makes me sad.

For I know in the end that it was never about what made me mad, or unhappy.

It is about now. The space that is here. And that in itself is brilliant diamond shining bright.